What a difference 14 hours makes

Well it's been about 14 hours since craziness struck, and I'm happy to report that Max has done a 180!  He has taken two bottles and has now breastfed on Kami.  He hasn't really cried today and is happily sleeping.  It was great that both Krista and my parents came up today.  It's a nice break as well as a good reliever.  Kami and I got to go to a sleep room and nap for a little.

Some of you know that I don't drink coffee, but in serious situations where I need a pick up I will.  So I went and got a Quad Espresso from Starbucks (yeah, that's 4 shots of espresso).  I don't think I will fall asleep for a while because man I am wired!  So I will sit here and watch Max's stats on his monitor like a cranked up day trader and let Kami nap a little.

On a serious note, thank you for all the comments and well wishes for our little man.  My Mom's classes even wrote individual cards for Max.  I think we have about 50 cards from 5th and 6th graders.  Kids we don't even know...praying or saying we love you.  It's both humbling and touching.

I am so grateful that we have a good support network.  From Krista taking the days off to be with Maya, to my parents driving up from Geneva to be with us, to Peter flying back from San Diego and watching Maya.  For all you parents out there, you never stop loving, worrying, supporting or just being a parent to your kids.  I'm 33 and there's still something that is comforting when my parents are around.  It's weird, I know they don't have the answers, no magic, no superpowers to make things better, but there's always that aura that everything will be alright because they're with me.  I guess as a parent that's one way you know you've done your job well - you're kids still want you to be there. 

So tonight I will sit and meditate (after I day trade on Max's vitals).  Think how I can always be there for my kids in a time like this.  Think of how, even if I don't have the answers,  I can assure them they will be ok.  If I don't have the magic, how I can conjure up tranquility and relief.  If I don't have superpowers (which if I did it would have to be flying, don't know how this would help any situation but still my power of choice), how I can carry the weight of their problems on my shoulders so they don't have to.  How I can be a parent like the parents Kami and I have.